5 ways to deal with anger biblically-Gods way

1. Remember that god works through trials. Think about how god would have you handle the situation

2. Ask the holy spirit to come through and focus on Gods words; breath

3. Address your anger don’t hide it — Mt 18:15–17

4. Ask if your anger is justified. Did the other person sin against you or just go against your comfort level and preferences.

5. Restrain It Proverbs 29:11 tells us that “Fools vent their anger, but the wise quietly hold it back.

Where does anger stem from? How does it start?

Anger is related to the “fight, flight or freeze; response of the sympathetic nervous system; it prepares humans to fight in protecting themselves. It can actually ruin your physical health in the long run. Prolonged release of the stress hormones that accompany anger can destroy neurons in areas of the brain associated with judgment and short term memory and weaken the immune system. Anger is perceived as a threat.

What if someone wrongs me!? Do I have the right to get angry?

Yes, but biblically remember. Be upset yet take your problem to God, not another human who is a sinner as well. You’re both just going to sin. Take it to your father who can make those true changes. Revenge will do nothing but have God see the wrong you did as well. Place it in God’s hands, his power is much stronger than yours. Lashing out feels better than bundling it in but it does not produce the righteousness of God (James 1:20). Remember our flesh is fighting our spirit, most likely whatever our desire is in that moment is from the flesh…so it is probably sinful or wrong. Be wise. A fool gives full vent to his spirit. Proverbs 29:11. Use your words wisely, a soft answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger. Which one of these scenarios will upset you?

‘Your pissing me the H*$!! Off!! Your so annoying dude, stop!!

or

‘Sweetheart can you please stop doing that, I don’t mean to be harsh but its getting under my skin now’

Different ways of addressing the problem and the outcome will be totally different responses. If someone wrongs you God will deal with that person. Show them your god and his power by turning away and giving it to him. Psalm 37:8 Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.

What is considered sinful when it comes to anger?

Anger becomes sinful when it is motivated by pride when it is unproductive and distorts God’s purposes. One major sign that anger has turned into sin is when we attack the wrongdoer instead of attacking the problem at hand.

5 things god-the bible says about anger:

1. Words can fuel or defuse anger. Your words have power whether you think so or not. Think of a hurtful thing someone has said to you in your childhood, you still remember it don’t you, even though you don’t choose to. Proverbs 15:1.

2. Focus on your gentle answers, look at synonyms of the harsh words you want to use. Find those that put out your emotions in the way God would want them, not how you’d want them. Focus on your words

3. Anger leads to sin, period. Gen 49:6. Our rational thoughts head straight out the door when our emotions go high. Our boundaries tend to grow weak, we can’t remember God’s words of knowledge, we go crazy! Then what do I do!? Breath. As simple as it sounds, it is that simple. Do not get comfortable with the situation, do not stick around a situation that is provoking your anger to rise.

You need to walk away from the situation and gather your thoughts before you speak if you’re quick to speak. BUT let the opponent know why, don’t just storm away. “I’m getting a bit frustrated right now, I’m just going to gather my thoughts I don’t want to say anything disrespectful. This will allow you to remember God’s word and gather knowledge on what to do. Breath, talk to god and think. Go and read scripture if you need to!

4. Don’t sit in your anger- Ephesians 4:26 Our natural default is to not let the other person know about our emotions and anger and keep it bundled up. The bible encourages us to talk to them, it only leads us to destruction and eventually holding a grudge over a situation. Healthy confrontation can help through the process of anger for the receiver to allow them to help and walk you through it, ending up with a reasonable conclusion not fury.

5. Fools allow room for anger- aren’t we all such fools. Letting our emotions control us versus us control our emotions…but it’s so much harder than we think and expect. Wisdom goes out the door when we get overcome by anger…what is the opposite of being wise? Foolish. A wise person learns to hold back anger and step away or defuse the situation.

6. Anger doesn’t just hurt others, it hurts you. Your anger robs you of the opportunity of forgiveness and healing. This turns away love, in which we should be giving to everyone.

Is it a sin itself to get angry?

No it’s not. Ephesians 4:26 states be angry but do not sin… The action you associate with anger is what is considered sinful or not. god has gotten angry! There are ways of handling anger and emotions, frustration, irritation, in such a way it is not sinful. For example, when you are feeling flustered, you can simply tell them ‘give me a second to gather my thoughts’ and go into a different room for a moment or take a walk; this will resolve you trying to have conflict with someone and lashing out at them, while all together calming yourself down and focusing on the correct way to handle the situation. Jesus even got angry! There’s times when anger moves us into action in a healthy way. The key to righteous anger is to not let it move us into sin.

Being so quick to anger is sinful; this is a struggle for most people, just ask for forgiveness and practice patience. Give that person or subject the benefit of the doubt; Proverbs 14:29-Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly.

My Personal Struggle

I have struggled with anger problems my entire life and just recently found ways to overcome it. Receiving questions from others like “Why do you want to be so angry all the time’? Just relax, don’t get so angry? Why cant you calm down’ etc. As if I truly enjoy boiling on the inside. No one has been able to understand where I come from when I get angry, and what I feel. I get so angry at times I truly don’t remember the words to express myself; I start sweating, crying, just not a good situation.

Bursting out in fury. Ruining relationships. But how do I fix who I am? If God made me this way, how can I change it? Am I a Christian since I get so angry…the bible says that Christians love and its hard for me to love? The answer to my problem is reasonably simple. God loves me the way I am. Ask him for guidance and forgiveness, meditate (not just read) on what the bible says on how to handle anger, practice it at all times.

After years, I have finally been in a place of learning how to deal with my anger, although I slip into my old habits sometimes, its my job to actively ask for forgiveness and practice healthy ways of dealing with my anger. How can you become like Jesus if you don’t know and study his character while practicing it? Keep going with intent, keep trying. Don’t blame it on ‘that’s just how you are’, no its not because you are not a slave to sin, you choose your life and your choices. Don’t label it as an ‘anger problem’ tell yourself it’s a struggle you have to overcome. You are not a slave to anger.